Return from Africa

Thanks to everyone who gave and prayed for my trip to Africa two weeks ago.  I have been trying to process what I would say about this trip.  I don't know where to start.  It was just utterly amazing.  I was nervous on the flight over there, feeling very under-prepared and rushed as I sorted through my outline.  By the time Wednesday rolled around (the day that I was slotted to teach about trauma healing) I felt nothing but excitement.  By that time I had realized that, even though the women at the conference were some of the most educated women in their communities, they were still desperate for information, for education, and for someone to validate their own experiences.  At the moment that I agreed to go on this trip back in June, the excitement I felt was not so much for Africa, but for the opportunity to give away information that I am passionate about, information that I feel can be helpful to those in crisis and who have experienced trauma.  All that excitement flooded back to me two Wednesdays ago and I was able to communicate clearly to the 50 women who attended the conference.

Conference facilitators and participants

Our team got a lot of positive feedback about the conference.  An overwhelming majority, however, commented that the most impactful session was taught by Pastor Ben, the country director of ALARM.  He taught on forgiveness, a topic that is incredibly relevant for these women who come from countries torn apart by war and genocide.  I feel that the subject of forgiveness is really what I walked away thinking about, feeling it weighing on my heart and mind.  It has really hit me since then how much forgiveness can impact our daily lives.  People don't just wake up one morning and decide to carry out a nation wide genocide.  It springs from roots planted deep for years and years in the soil of unforgiveness.  Then the deplorable acts lead to further unforgiveness, until brothers and sisters in Christ can't walk into a room without scanning it to decide who is a Hutu and who is a Tutsi.  Trust is shattered and reconciliation fails to triumph because of a small seed planted so many years ago.  So what does this have to do with me, in 2012 in Fort Worth?  I have been thinking about this:  when I get upset, when I feel my rights have been trampled, when my relationships are in trouble, aren't these things all due in part to an unforgiving heart?  How much easier it would be to just let things go!  Things that don't really even matter in the first place.  What small tiny seeds of unforgiveness do I hold on to that could potentially be passed along to those around me by negative or critical comments.  What would happen if these seeds grew and grew and grew?  One of the things that Pastor Ben talked about was that we only have the ability to forgive because we have known what it is to receive forgiveness.  What if, when I am wronged, I return my gaze to a Savior who was wrongly accused and took on my sin so that I could experience what it was like to be forgiven even before I said I was sorry?  What if I forgave as I have been forgiven, out of an endless supply of unconditional love?

Getting to attend church on Sunday before flying out.

Two unexpected blessings happened on the trip.  I didn't expect to get time to visit any of the country while I was at the conference.  I got not one but two amazing opportunities while I was there.  The first was probably one of the worst places I have ever been:  two churches that had been made into memorials for the Rwandan genocide in 1994.  Over 15,000 people were killed at these two sites alone.  The second was probably one of the most amazingly beautiful places I have ever been: Akagera National Park, home to impala, hippopotamus, giraffe, zebra, baboons and all kinds of other amazing wildlife.  Pictures won't do either one justice, but I will leave you with a few images. 

 Thanks again to all of the faithful friends who have encouraged me, shown me love, support and forgiveness over the years.  This trip would not have happened without you!