Expectations for Happiness

So many people talk to me about having an expectation that they should be happy.  Almost on a daily basis I hear something like, "I'm just not happy [in my marriage, in my job, with my position in life, etc]."  I think people are often shocked when they hear my response: I'm really not the biggest fan of "happy."  The current issue of Psychology today has a cover story about the usefulness of "negative" emotions, stating, "Negative emotions are not only crucial to our existence but also--ironically--to feeling good.  To live optimally in the world and endure its challenges, it's necessary to engage the full range of psychological states we've inherited as humans."  My own journeys through the minefields of feeling deeply unhappy have been shocking and discouraging.  I like feeling happy just as much as the next person.  But I've come to appreciate the range of emotions that we are designed to experience as humans, and I've become convinced that the relentless expectation and pursuit of "happy" can cause a person to take a quick, deep and unexpected nose-dive. 

And then there's the Bible.  This verse jumped out at me a few weeks ago, and I've come back to it several times since then:  

It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees.  Psalm 119:71

Really, Psalmist??  It was GOOD for me to be afflicted?  I don't know how many of you have been afflicted, but I don't know that I always see it as good.  When I see it first hand or when I see it in the lives of those closest to me, the first word that comes to mind is rarely "good."  Affliction feels icky at best, devastating at worst, never good.  But there it is in black and white, in the Word of God, affliction=good.  And not just good for the sake of affliction, but good for the sake of causing a person to sit and cling to the Word.  I know that when I have handled hard times the best it has been with my Sword on my tongue and as the meditation of my heart.  That is when I can look back and say that it was good.  That is when I can say that, despite the affliction, I am at peace internally (see verse 165). 

So as we meditate on these truths, will you do something together with me?  As we begin this new year, as we resolve to be healthier, more organized, more in tune, less distracted, more engaged, more purposeful, may we not do this for the sake of happiness, but rather holiness.  May we be people of "great peace" because we are staid on the Word with our eyes fixed on the Author of life.  May we not join the overwhelming rush of culture that is so fixated on happiness that all it can find is misery at what it doesn't have.  May we be agents of change in that culture, examples of being able to be at peace in the midst of and despite great affliction.  May we be able to join the Psalmist in saying that it is good.